Relationships: A Short Guide for Multidimensional Folks

LoveofSoulsDiscriminating between our physical perception of reality (3rd dimension) and our emotions (4th dimension) is the touchstone for healing relationships.

The third dimension is the physical reality, a setting based on three dimensional forms, where beings acknowledge themselves as physical bodies and value their interactions according to what such bodies do.

The fourth dimension abides beyond the third dimension. It includes the third dimension, though it is excluded by the third dimension. As a result from a three-dimensional perspective it is not possible to describe the fourth dimension, though some strategic attempts aimed at stretching our limited awareness can serve the purpose as long as their implications are clear and they do not replace  the expanded awareness they intend to support.

This is the aim of this short and provisional article. What follows below is merely strategic and if you decide to read on, please be aware that what counts primarily is the way your mind is triggered, no matter whether you resonate or not with what follows.

The third dimension is populated by beings having a physical body and moving within a three dimensional space, while in the fourth dimension beings have an emotional body endowed of a fourth additional possibility of movement, i.e. the capacity to move through time.

Movement through time is formally precluded in the third dimension. What we see in the physical reality is only limited to the third dimension. The problem is that at an informal level we also abide in the fourth dimension, which we experience similarly to the way a blind person perceives the outer world.

As human beings with a physical body we sense the fourth dimension, yet we cannot see its forms and inevitably get a false perception of what is going on there. The truth is that we constantly travel through time, living both in the past and future, constantly having intense emotions related to old memories or anticipations of events.

Past and future are specific fourth dimensional locations with a huge variety of scenarios and identities. This means that we hold several fourth dimensional selves with diverse stages of development. The issue in the third dimension is that human relationships are based on the exclusive acknowledgement of physical bodies and the exclusion of emotional, or fourth dimensional, bodies. These latter bodies modify all the time, instigating inexorable turmoil in ordinary human relationships, which is the fundamental cause of sufferance and soul loss in the third dimension.

The physical body is merely a vehicle or piece of clothing for the emotional body. This means that a third dimensional vehicle, a human being, legally registered in our physical reality with a given identity and passport can be driven by a huge variety of emotional beings. The fact that such beings do not have legal status, and therefore do not formally exist, produces major upheavals in our relationships and causes the fracture between fourth and third dimension.

Bridging the fracture between fourth and third dimension is the primary healing enterprise for gaining multidimensional awareness. This fracture is the crucial zone of all pain, traumas and wounds.

As human beings from time to time we do experience peaks of ecstasy and love, merging into one another and unveiling our original unity. Yet, if we are unable to understand the difference between physical and emotional bodies, the same ecstasy and love inescapably turns into terror, resentment, hate and the most horrible grievances. This is what occurs in most human relationships behind their apparent romance and fascination. This is also the grievance that keeps being recycled collectively from one generation to another.

In the above respect the first healing step entails acquiring an unbending integrity and pragmatism regarding physical interactions. This strategically involves developing and strengthening skills in intention and agreement setting, endurance and completion.

The measure of assessment of the integrity in relationships is based on the awareness of mutually and formally acknowledged healing agreements, as opposed to hidden agendas, emotional blackmail and assumptions. A healing agreement is such when it can be acknowledged and measured at a physical pragmatic level, and not on arbitrary emotional postulations.

For example, I may make an agreement to meet with a friend for one hour every week during three months and have a walk in the local park. During this time, we decide first to talk in turn for 20 minutes, with one speaking and the other listening with full attention. Then we walk in silence for 20 minutes holding our hands and spend the remaining time sharing about our experience and finally blessing each other.

In the above example the measure of the integrity and loyalty in our relationship is the capacity of honouring this agreement. If my friend or I would like to do something else besides walking in the park, this could be part of another  agreement as long as we both agree and define its practical details. If there is no agreement nobody can claim anything, just like in any formal contract.

Healing agreements are educational devices aimed at teaching how to discriminate between what I have actually decided with my friend in a mutually acknowledged setting, i.e. the third dimension, and all my emotions regarding my friend at a fourth dimensional level.

Provided that my friend still continues to walk with me for one hour a week during a period of three months, it does not matter what she/he does during the rest of her/his life. This also includes the possibility that my friend may decide to walk in the park with someone else. If I get to know this, I may be envious and resentful, yet this is fourth dimensional stuff and has nothing to do with my friend in the third dimension, unless as part of our healing agreement it has been decided that I am the only one with whom she/he can walk in the park.

The fact that my envy and resentment are fourth dimensional stuff does not mean that there is something wrong about those emotions and that I should repress them. On the contrary these emotions are very powerful energies and need to be expressed, yet in the context where they belong, which is the fourth dimension and not the third dimension.

This is possible only if I hold the unbending clarity that my grievances, since they have truly nothing to do with my friend need to be dealt with in the fourth dimensional level. This level implies an expanded awareness, which is collective and archetypal.

If I am envious towards my friend grievances have apparently been triggered by my incapacity to acknowledge the fourth dimension. Hence it is my responsibility to find ways to expand my awareness and find out what is truly going on. This implies not involving my friend, unless I have a specific healing agreement with her/him that involves assistance in such circumstances.

The way of dealing with grievances in the fourth dimension is to address the archetypal level, which can be done through shamanic practices, such as the Basic Ritual of the Sacred Cone or Recapitulation. These practices are also part of healing agreements, yet involving the fourth dimension.

The training ground for the genuine implementation of honourable relationships is the integrity in my pragmatic healing agreements with other human beings. A customary objection is that living a life based on agreements, inhibits spontaneity and the excitement of life. This may be true. Yet agreements are mentioned here only as the first step, with other major steps following on the healing path. Whatever the case in the end what counts is our direct experience and nothing is fixed or absolute there.

On my part I notice that I can be far more spontaneous and liberated when I relate with people that respect agreements and boundaries, without manipulating with their emotions or hidden agendas. Having transparent agreements also prevents me from doing the same.

Emotions are sacred collective energies, which can be used to manifest healing intentions. Among such emotions love is the most manipulated and abused of all. Here genuine love in the end involves being able to love someone to the extent of letting him or her go, yet without affecting in any way that love. When this is not the case, love is being abused and not employed for healing purposes.

In some astroshamanic practices, such as the Basic Ritual, the stage of release is preceded by the stage of intention, which provides focus and containment for grievances. Once the intent is set and honoured, then emotions can erupt and be held. These emotions can be extremely disruptive and is very rare that two or more individuals can manage their impact unless they have created a solid foundation of trust. Yet, this trust, as I see it, is not based on emotions and feelings. It is based on pragmatic adherence to healing agreements, which can be proved and verified through the physical senses. It is founded on fully honouring the contract with my fellow human beings.

The first strategic step in the healing process is to establish clear contracts and honour them. This also implies releasing people who prove not to be capable of doing this or with whom I prove not to be capable.

When people are not open to respect the boundaries of agreed contracts and persist in wanting you to fulfil their fourth dimensional fantasies regarding their paradigm of love, they end up building a cage from which it can be very hard and painful to get out.

Here it is vital to let go of them before it is too late. Yet again this does not mean to withdraw the love, which for a person on the path will still be there although the partner involved may not perceive it anymore.

The problem with shamanic or multidimensional oriented folks is that their capacity to love is much larger than ordinary people. For them the relationship continues also when the relationship has apparently ended, just like life continues after death. Their love is not based on the third dimensional perspective, which acknowledges only the physical body. It embraces the soul level encompassing both third and fourth dimension.

The issue here comes from a third dimensional environment which is in fearful denial of the fourth dimension. This brings accusations to those folks of not making any sense, of being detached, distant, unable to open one’s heart or promiscuous. This blaming is unfair for shamanic and multidimensional oriented folks are much more sensitive than ordinary people. They feel the grievances their partners go through and their level of empathy is such that they can hardly make any difference between their feelings and their partner’s.

This is because they dwell mainly in the fourth dimension and in that realm emotions are collective and do not belong to anyone. As a result, when their partners are in pain and insist on having a narrow perspective, shamanic folks cannot be of any help for their perception is based on a much wider configuration. Nevertheless their empathy and compassion may be such that they can even release their expanded awareness and dive into their partner’s limited configuration with the genuine desire to be of service.

The fatal risk here is that they can experience the most unbearable tortures if they get trapped in their partner’s cage and lose sight of the configuration they truly belong too. The capacity to take this risk in a pragmatic and responsible way is a basic requirement for multidimensional oriented folks on the healing path. This is crucial to the collective expansion of consciousness. Of course, this may appear most scaring and yet behind the wall of fears blessings may await.

© 2009 Franco Santoro, Cluny Hill College, Forres IV36 2RD, Scotland,
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Image: The Love of Souls, by A. Andrew Gonzalez